Editor’s Note: This posting was made by Jeff’s roommate and corgi, Samuel Corgilton III. If you would like to see Sam’s previous blog go to www.corgilicious.blogspot.com
Welcome. I welcome you to the inner workings of my extraordinarily highly developed brain. My roommate, Jeffrey, has allowed me to blog in order to add some class, some intellect, some je ne sais quoi to an otherwise juvenile exercise in narcissism. To see a clip of our “fascinating” interactions click here.
Well, Jason, thank you for your readership first of all. It is important for an author to connect with his audience. I cherish listening. In Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People, the classic groundbreaking book, he purports that listening is the most important aspect of conversation. I would have to agree with him as I am sure he would agree with me in my thesi presented in two books, Never a Lover Had More to Give, a history of the art of petting and Finding the Good in Badminton: A Memoir of My Time on Tour. Although the books vary in subject matter, style, and pop-up-edness, they both touch on a fundamental truth of human/canine nature and that is the need to connect, to love, to listen.
Anyway, back to your suggestion Jason. I have no idea what you are talking about. No clue.
Yet, I will tell you this: I have never played a video game in my life. Is it because I lack opposable thumbs and the ability to sense what a television does? Possibly. Or is it because I choose to live my life with the spirit of Helen Keller, the passion of Vincent Van Gogh, the joie de vivre of Carson Daly? After my time is done and I have lived a good 13 years on this earth, would I be happy if I said that I spent the majority of it trying to get a cartoonish gorilla up a haphazard series of ropes and jumps all the while avoiding barrels? Unequivocally, the answer is a resounding no!
Just yesterday I managed to eat dinner with a wonderful young lassie, 4 human 28 dog years old. We had conversation. Real conversation about the plight of the Japanese Akita breed immigration to America. We talked of the ever expanding universe and to what it is exanding into. We talked of the humiliation of the need to drag our butts on the floor occasionally. After lunch I went to a reading at a local college. Following the reading I found myself in a conversation across a chain link fence with a real hobo dog.
Now, that my friends, is a dog who is free. I then went to my pottery class because it is important to expand your brain in new and exciting ways every opportunity you can. I ended the night by dumping 14 pounds of fur on Jeffrey’s couch. My bad about that one. You try wearing an Eddie Bauer triple stiched hand woven, fleece, fur lined, snowsuit available in M-XX. Then, and only then, will you have a sense of what it means to be a mighty corgi in the summer heat of Missouri.
To all the readers, I wish you the best. Remember the immortal words of Rihanna, “Just live your life. Oh oh oh oh oh. Instead of chasing that paper. Just live your life.”
Throw yourself at the Total Request Live countdown of life. Like Carson…like Carson.
Next prompt: What is a bad excuse for being late for work in the morning?