This was a rare occasion when we did not receive a suggestion from the previous question. So, G. Norm will be filling in. As always, this may or may not actually be Jeff’s Grandma Norma typing the post. Maybe it is though.gnorm smile copy

Check out the latest Youtube posting from the Mystery Hour.

Holla back youngins! This be G. Norm comin’ at you from Iowa, where the corn is tall and the women be taller. You betcha! Oh, hee, hee, hee. That reminds me of good country sayings that my grandpa used to say all the time. Here are my favorites:

You can’t skin a raccoon twice, that’s just stealing

You can’t teach a possum to use a blender

You don’t plant a 2 X 4 and hope for a barn

You can get a donkey to give you a bath, but don’t ask him to dry you off

Pimpin’ ain’t easy, but it sure is fun

When the sun goes down in it’s place comes up the moonshine

Don’t jump in a pond made of marmalade, unless you is hungry

Enter a home through the backdoor, but always enter a funeral home through the front

B-I-G-B-O-P-P-A, no info for the DEA, federal agents made ‘cuz I’m flagrant tap my cell and the phone in my basement.

Look out for something called Y2K in 70-80 years.

I remember when my Grandpa came back from World War I. He had been through a lot, sure he had. We used to talk long into the night about which is worse, fighting a war or growin’ up in da hood. Hee hee hee. We would be on the porch of the old farm house just talking and talking. I was in my glory! He would tell me stories of hand to hand combat and mustard gas and I would tell him stories about drive-bys and mustard and gas. Oh it was a hoot! Booyah!

I think the war messed with his head though. He kept telling me that there would be a big stock market crash in ’29. This was 1927 so I didn’t believe him. Yet, sho-nuf it happened. Then he said there would be another world war. Oh snap, it happened! He also said there would be a triumphant singing group made up only of brothers and that they would be musically gifted beyond anyone else of their time. He went on to say that they would rise to prominence via some sort of station that used Steamboat Willie as a mascot. I’ll be darned if he wasn’t talking about the Jonas Brothers. He also said something about the Mayans and a calendar and the end of the world, but I was fast asleep by then. 

Sleep tight, don’t let the bed buggies bite, happy dreams, and I will see you tomorry-day!

 

Boom Boom Pow! Out!

G. Norm

Next prompt: What is the first album you ever bought?

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About jeffhoughton

I'm a sometimes writer, actor, comedian and an all the time adventurer.

One response »

  1. Michelle says:

    Sheryl Crow was my first CD. My first tape was Michael Jackson’s BAD.

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