Hey, hey. Back to work. Mystery Hour is Friday, which means a busy week. Our winning bidder for the guest spot is actually really cool. I was kind of worried that it wasn’t going to be somebody interesting, but it is, it is. His name is Allen Marsh and he is an actor. He lives locally but manages to keep a successful career going doing film and commercial acting. Plus, he’s just a neat guy. Yeah, I said neat. Would you like a Werther’s Original?bright teeth 2

For the last post I asked: What is the last thing that you bought at Wal Mart?

I’ll use Shanner’s answer:

 

“Tis the season – I bought SCHOOL SUPPLIES! And, I tell you – the teachers can be picky! They want 24 crayons, but not RoseArt, they don’t color as good. 24 pencils, but ONLY the plain yellow ones. The cool decorated ones jam up the sharpeners, apparently. Colored pencils – only 12 – 16, NOT the 24 pack. A heavy duty binder – but NOT a Trapper Keeper. Why? I still don’t understand the ban on Trapper Keepers. They were the coolest binders to have when I was in school. The list goes on and on of what to get, and what NOT to get. I hope I passed the test.”

 

I absolutely hated this time of year when the school supplies commercials would come out. School was okay, but I much preferred summer. Even worse was the trip to go get the school supplies with my mom. We would be in Wal Mart, or wherever, and I would be upset. When I was real little, before I remember, I used to have bad temper tantrums. I’m pretty laid back now, but back then I most certainly was not. Eventually, I grew out of it and just became a regular kid who hated going to buy school supplies.

Here is a bad school supply list:

4   #4 pencils

2   bottles of Elmer’s glue

2   plastic spoons that can fit into glue bottle

3   turtlenecks

1   box of Crayola special edition 400  crayons. If you cannot gain access to the specialty crayons you will need to buy 200 candles and 14 bottles of food coloring. Be sure to include the colors, blood red, scabby orange, violet vomit, that stuff you get in your eye in the morning gold, swine flu pink.

1   ziploc baggie of glass shards. Any colors and shape. This will be for a stained glass art project

2   viles of children’s tears. Miss Henderson is working on a potion.

1   parent’s bank statement so teacher is able to know which child to kiss up to.

1  battering ram

3  ten pill boxes of Sudafed. Again, for Miss Henderson’s ‘potion.’ It’s easier for her if the boxes come from different sources and are untraceable.

4  Trapper Keepers. Not the extreme notebook, but what you keep from a trap. i.e. pelts, rabbit’s feet, cat legs.

8   Markers of different colors. Actually, we’ll call them daubers. Miss Henderson plans on using them at Bingo, ahem, the class field trip about probabilities.

2  Michael Bolton CD’s. Miss Henderson is not allowed within 100 feet of Mr. Bolton, or to buy any of his music. But, sometimes she misses his velvety voice. You know? What’s a little taste of the Bolt? It can’t hurt right?

1 pair of binoculars

Next prompt: What is your favorite TV show that you are ashamed to love?

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About jeffhoughton

I'm a sometimes writer, actor, comedian and an all the time adventurer.

2 responses »

  1. Jason says:

    Man…I’m going to miss going to the Mystery Hour. 😦

    Anyway…I’d have to say my favorite show I’m shamed to love is More To Love. I only watch it because it seems to be the low point of American television…”hey, let’s do the bachelor only with fat chicks!”

  2. Shanners says:

    Ha! You used my answer – I feel special, even though you just might not have had a choice.

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