One day away from the next installment of the Mystery Hour. You should go. We all should go. Everyone’s going to be there. Jimmy, Frank, Rae-Rae, Angry the Lamp…Angry the Lamp is a name I thought of yesterday for a bad character on a bad children’s show.

For the last prompt I asked: What was the last voicemail that you checked about?Jeff_shelf

I will use Amanda’s answer:

 

“I honestly can’t remember when my last voicemail even was. Apparently I always answer the phone. It seems I need to work on my aloofness and unavailability.

This post made me laugh out loud at work.”

 

Yes, Amanda, it appears as though your aloofness needs some tending to. I never know if I should answer my cell phone everytime it rings. That is the ultimate tension that will define our time. Some people answer it right away, while others never answer, and still others don’t have cell phones at all. I call them strangers.

 

I’m glad the post made you laugh out loud at work. Work can be a difficult place to find humor. Here are some tips for making work more enjoyable.

-Slowly take one item at a time each day from your neighbor’s cubicle, until eventually your cubicle is decorated exactly as your neighbor’s cubicle used to be decorated. The more item’s you can amass before your coworker notices, the more successful you are.

-Steal your co-workers memories. Whenever anyone is sitting around talking, bust out a story in first person. The key is that the story you tell is a story you have heard a co-worker tell before about themselves. When they jump in with, “Hey, that’s my story!” Just say, “Oh! Were you there?”

-Build a fort. What is a cubicle if not a rudimentary fort? The walls most certainly don’t go to the ceiling. All you need are blankets and pillows, and you have those at home. Select only a couple of people who are allowed in the fort. Come up with a cool name for the fort like, The Citadel, Af’fortable Housing, FEMA.

-Office Chair Olympics. There are a variety of events you can include in the festivities. Head to head races, archery (using rubber bands, pens, and paper clips), synchronized dancing. With the right equipment you can even do the pole vault over cubicle walls. For an instant you’ll look like the movie Elliot and E.T. in the moonlight.

-Strip colloquialisms. Pick out some of your boss’s favorite sayings. At the beginning of the day each employee selects one. Everytime your boss says your phrase you have to remove an article of clothing. This is a very dangerous game and should mostly be played by guys.

-I Spy Something Manila. It’s the classic ‘I Spy’ game, with a twist, you can only find things that are manila. This game is impossible to play at home where folder and envelopes are scarce.

-Musical Theatre. At a given point on a given day you and your favorite co-workers bust into a choreographed song and dance number. It is important that you are the majority. This way when you are performing the other remaining (prose) co-workers question whether they should join in.

Here’s an example (the backup singers are in parentheses):

“Carol, it’s seems we’re out of staples!”

      (Staples, staples)

Carol, we’ll have to go to Naples!”

    (Naples, Naples)

“These paperclips they just won’t do,

They’re the equivalent of Post It glue.

They’re in my hair, they’re in my face,

I need something that will hold in place.”

   (she needs staples, staples)

Next prompt: When you were a kid, what did you imagine you would be doing with your life at the age you are now?

Advertisements

About jeffhoughton

I'm a sometimes writer, actor, comedian and an all the time adventurer.

4 responses »

  1. Michelle says:

    wa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!!! I love it! I wish that I have been here longer to try some of these shenanigans (no clue how to spell that).

    I imagined myself to be tall and sleek and a business woman who has a mean dancing/singing streak in her when the time is just right– like the lady in Singing in the Rain.

  2. Speedy Gonzales says:

    I know a guy…

  3. sarahj83 says:

    the staples song made my day! am looking fondly at my stapler, humming a tune.

  4. sarahj83 says:

    oh! and in my 4th grade yearbook i listed “actress, writer, first female president” as my future plans. two out of three ain’t bad…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s