October 9, 2009

I splurged and took the ferry to work today. It was a nice change of pace. Yes, you are correct that Springfield is a remarkably landlocked Midwestern city. However, as of yesterday it is ‘The Venice of the Ozarks,’ except it will still exist in ten years. Mystery Hour Oct 13 011

For the last prompt I asked: What is the last thing you said to your mother over the phone?

I’ll use Dan’s answer:


“I think it was something along the lines of “I gotta go cuz I’m sleepy,” but I could be completely wrong. I had, in fact, been woken from a nap; not by natural means, but by her phone call. I don’t have a long history of talking on the phone while sleepy, but my sister certainly does.

When she was in high school, especially, she would sometimes receive a call at our house while she was napping. There were multiple times when she had an actual conversation with various friends of hers–not just her saying “yeah…uh-huh…ok,” but giving actual answers and helping come up with plans and where to meet and such–all while completely asleep.

The next day, or whenever she saw said friend next, they would mention the plans, or the time for the plans would actually come and go, and her friends would be like “why didn’t you show up??” and she would have no idea what they were talking about. Just completely unaware because she had in fact been sleep-talking while making these plans with people.

I would still find it hard to believe to this day, if it hadn’t been for the fact that I’ve seen it happen multiple times with my own eyes.”


Dan, it sounds from your story that I may be your sister. I will respond to your story with a story and a list. In 2000, 7 months after Y2k devastated the world, I had gone as a leader to Young Life camp with a group from my hometown, Iowa City. The camp was called Castaway and was in Minnesota. We arrived in our cabin and began the process of choosing bunks. As a good leader, I let the kids choose first and I took whatever was leftover. So, I got stuck with the top bunk that had a cumbersome ceiling beam going perpendicular across the bed.

The next morning I awoke, not in the normal way, with drool and bedhead. I awoke because I could hear myself nearly yelling swear words…at a camp where I was a leader…of high school kids…who were going to be presented with the Gospel. Not only that, I was on the other side of the bed, I had a strong headache, and I was doing that thing where you put your hand on your head and then bring it into your line of sight to see if your bleeding. I was.

Apparently, in the night I must have bolted upright from my slumber, like an exuberant piece of Texas toast from the toaster, slamming my face into the corner of the beam. The beam must have knocked me out. Then, I must have writhed for awhile, ending up on the other side of the bed. After some good writhing, I apparently channeled a Quentin Tarantino movie, and did a one act play of tourettes-like creative swear words. When I came to my senses I heard whispers of, “Is that Jeff?” “Why is he yelling at us?” “Ooh, that was a good one. I never thought of combining those words.”

Eventually, I got a butterfly bandage and forged onward inspiring the young men I was leading…to choose their beds wisely.

Here is a list of  bad places to suddenly wake up:

-A test.

-A plane (you are the pilot).

-Rock climbing.

-In a sheep fire (Allan).

-A spousal argument (been there).

-A Sleepaholics Anonymous meeting

-A children’s soccer game with your shirt over your head after scoring what you believe to be the game winning goal in the World Cup.

*I once woke up in a lecture, surprised to see my hand raised to answer the professor’s question, but I had no idea what she was talking about. She looked at me and I violently shook my head for her not to call on me. It was a Zen Buddhism class. I may have achieved Enlightenment in that moment.

Next prompt: What are you doing tonight?


About jeffhoughton

I'm a sometimes writer, actor, comedian and an all the time adventurer.

4 responses »

  1. Dan says:

    Tonight I am going to see a comedy show at the Gillioz. Michael and Michael Have Live Tour. It should be really funny, even though Springfield is not actually listed as being on their tour. The first city listed is Detroit on October 11th. I guess maybe Springfield is the warm-up round??

    Or maybe they don’t want to be embarrassed by Ozarkians?? Either way, it’s gonna be superb.

    Before that, I’m going to Incredible Pizza. And maybe I’ll play some of the games. Either way, it’s gonna be incredible.

  2. Amanda says:

    I’m going to see Michael and Michael too! Before that it depends on which of my parents is coming with me. If it’s just my mom, then we are going to dinner at Izumi Hatake. If it’s both my parents, then I am taking them to dinner at the French Quarter Cafe – I owe my dad a birthday dinner there. His birthday was in February.

  3. Matt says:

    Wallowing in self-pity. I feel like a Cubs fan.

  4. Shanners says:

    Well, it’s not Oct. 9 anymore, but since what I did Oct. 9 was more exciting than tonight, I’ll use Oct. 9. Oct. 9 was quite exciting because it was my son’s birthday party. His birthday is the 10th, but we had his party on the 9th at 1984 arcade. Been there? It’s fun. For him, it’s obviously not nostalgic – which is why it’s such a cool place to most other people. To a 9 yr. old, it’s all new – but he loves it there, even though he knows they’re “old school” games. We had pizza and cake and good company and games. Then we went to the Skinny Improv to see the 7:30 show, where my son and another guy celebrating his birthday were called on stage, and an improvisational story about their grand birthday adventure was told. After that, we went home, but my day was not over yet. I stayed up late making cake balls decorated like soccer balls to take to his soccer game the following morning. Whew…what a day! 🙂

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