October 20, 2009

I was unable to post yesterday, I was in court. I was unable to post yesterday, I couldn’t get wi-fi in the Andes. I couldn’t post yesterday, The unicorn wouldn’t stop running. I’m trying to think of cool excuses for not posting. I couldn’t post yesterday because I was not in a giant helium balloon aircraft. Yep, that’s it. IMG_0174

For the last prompt I asked: What was your last Facebook status update?

I’ll use Amanda’s answer:

 

“I’ve caught myself doing the balled up Kleenex in the pocket a few times lately… apparently 25 is the new 75.

My last facebook status:
“Shakespeare’s and Sparky’s make going to Columbia and back on a Wednesday totally worth it.”

My friend Sarah’s car broke down in Columbia a couple weeks ago, so on Wednesday we made a little road trip with our boyfriends to go get it. Sarah treated us all to Shakespeare’s pizza. Yes, it does in fact take 4 people to pick up 1 car.”

 

I was tempted to use R. H. Wilhoit’s suggestion just because he sounds like a wealthy industrialist from 1913. You wear a monocle don’t you R.H.? Don’t you? Thanks for commenting and taking the time away from hunting foxes at your leisure. There is nothing like a good road trip, eh? I’ve had my fair share of road trips over the years. I would have to say my favorite was when I flew out to California with my brother, Jon, and my parents. My dad coaches tennis and we got to go out there for their spring trip over Spring Break. Little did my 1986 self know that it would be his last flight, ever.

Motel.

 “Hey guys, are you ready for another adventure?” said my dad, pulling up his tube socks from his white leather tennis shoes.

“Yeah Dad, that sounds great!” I said putting on my new Sea World baseball cap. “Are we going to go to Disneyland again?”

“Even better,” said Dad.

“Disneyworld?” exclaimed Jon hoping that with enough enthusiasm he could make it happen.

“Your mother and I decided it would be even cooler if we drove back from California all the way to Iowa!”

“How long will that take?” I asked with growing skepticism.

“Three days,” explained my mother, pulling up her tube socks.

“That’s how long it took Jesus to roadtrip from Jerusalem to Heaven,” exclaimed Jon.

“We don’t have a car,” I muttered, kicking the shag motel carpeting.

“We can rent one. It will be an adventure,” said my mother reassuringly.

“Can we get a Delorean like in Back to the Future?” I said with skepticism waning.

“Sure, Jeff, we can get a Delorean.”

 

And so we went, trekking eastward across the country like a dyslexic pioneer. Here is a random sampling of things overheard on our trip:

“Can we fill up the flux capacitor at regular gas stations?”

“If this is really a time machine, how come we aren’t there yet?”

“Nevada smells like a mixture of Oreos and old chicken broth?”

“If we stay overnight in Vegas, do we have to stay in Vegas?”

“Jon’s legs are touching mine!”

“Dad, why do you swear everytime you see a policeman?”

   “It’s policeman language for ‘hello.'”

“If a Smurf goes to the beach, what color do they turn?”

“Michael Jackson is such a good normal guy.”

“Why did God make Nebraska? Was it an accident?”

“Saltine crumbs are stuck to to my thighs.”

And so the Houghton family made it back to Iowa in one piece. We all still even talked to each other afterwards.

 

Next prompt: What is something you have in your pocket right now?

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About jeffhoughton

I'm a sometimes writer, actor, comedian and an all the time adventurer.

2 responses »

  1. Dan says:

    I have burt’s bees in my front right pocket, and i have notes on notecards in my back left pocket. I would never keep the two in the same pocket.

  2. Jason says:

    My right hand because I had to check what was in my pocket.

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