November 3, 2009

It’s Tuesday, which means radio stations across the country are giving you two Taylor Swift songs in a row today during their Two for Tuesday no repeat workday. Yea! Mystery Hour is Friday. Don’t forget. ——>>>>>

Jeff JuniorFor the last prompt I asked: What have you spent most of your day doing today?

I’ll use Shanner’s answer:


“I’d like to see that 3 piece suit someday. Are you going to wear it to the Mystery Hour?
To answer your question, I spent the first part of the day volunteering at my kids’ school. I took a lot of pictures of “crazy hair day” (part of red ribbon week) for the yearbook. I also took pictures of the kindergarten classes making root beer. I also took pictures of my daughter, who got student of the month in her class. Yay!
Then I came home and spent way too much time looking up old clips of the Ellen Degeneres Show, and not enough time doing laundry. My favorite clips were of Ellen interviewing Dakota Fanning, Pink, and Kellie Pickler.”


I will start by saying, it’s nice to have Allan back in the mix from his court ordered Mystery Hour sabbatical. Remember, it is okay over the internet, just not okay in person. Thanks for the comment. Shanners, for me every school picture was crazy hair day. Man, that used to be a lot of pressure, school picture day. You have one moment to try to capture your looks/personality/joie de vie/bad assery. The morning preparation was big, followed by the rest of the school day, with all of the myriad of messing up possibilities, then the chance that you will get jostled in line and lose your look.

Then there was the even scarier day when you got your pictures back and you have no idea what it’s going to look like. Then you get it and it’s not good. It’s not bad enough for a re-do and it’s not good enough to show off. Sometimes you find yourself jealous of Brandon, the kid who got stung by a bee on the lip the day before the picture. He’s definitely getting a re-do. Why couldn’t you have been so lucky, you ask yourself.

In fourth grade I tried using gel for the first time. I didn’t know how much to use and it ended up looking like I had dipped my head in the class goldfish, Golda Meir’s, home right before the click. In eighth grade I was determined to make my smile and collar perfect. What resulted was a strange levee looking collar circle surrounding my neck and the smile of someone who just proudly embezzled millions of dollars.

My favorite my be my brother, Jon, who wanted to use gel in his picture. When he asked my mom where it was she told him the proper cabinet, but did not mention the fact that it was in the same cupbord as her Nair, hair removing gel. He slopped it on all over his head. When he walked out my mother understandably freaked out upon recognition of the smell. They washed it out sufficiently, but Jon is now scared of bikinis.


Here’s a rundown of school picture results possibilities:

1. Odd realization. You heretofore had never known that your eyes weren’t the same size. When you ask your ‘friend’ about it he says, ‘Oh yeah, totally, why do you think we call you Semi-cyclops?’ It is very similar to hearing your recorded voice for the first time.

2. Distraction. Somehow there is a giant moth inside that distracts you as the picture is taken. Your picture looks like you’re trying to be aloof and sexy.

3. Giant head. They zoomed in on your head more than your fellow students, making your picture look like Charlie Brown amongst Waldos on the classroom wall.

4.Hooded sweatshirt. You forgot it was school picture day so you wore your WWF sweatshirt. It happened to everybody.

5. Stupid photographer. She kept telling you to turn your head and raise/lower your chin so many times that you end up looking like a constipated contortionist.

Next prompt: What is your favorite noise?


About jeffhoughton

I'm a sometimes writer, actor, comedian and an all the time adventurer.

3 responses »

  1. Amanda says:

    I really like the paper-swishy noise it makes when you empty the recycle bin on the computer. I’m sad when I empty the bin and didn’t realize the speakers were on mute.

  2. allan says:

    i’m a huge fan of the electric hum that eminates from flourescant lights. a small reminder that the power of the sun has a price.

  3. habitgirl says:

    Johnny Cash’s voice: singing, talking, ululating – I don’t care, I like it all.

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