January 8, 2010

It is hovering around zero degrees out there, all you want to do is snuggle up with a blanket and a good book. Don’t. Resist the urge. Come to the Mystery Hour tonight.

Seriously, it will be worth it.

Here’s the info:

Friday, January 8th
10:15 pm
Skinny Improv Comedy Theater
KIRBY VAN BURCH, Branson entertainer, who was indeed named the International Magician of the Year

NICOLA GILARDI, hilarious chef who will show us how to cook something

CORNBELT CHORUS, one of my favorite bands, who I’ve been trying to get on for a long time

Price: $5.00. Price drop for the recession!

Plus, appearances by your favorite Skinny Improv performers

Reserve tickets online at www.theskinnyimprov.com

Now, it’s time for the RIDICULOUS SEARCH TERMS! As always, these are real searches terms that brought people to this website. They are followed by the disappointment level of the searcher upon arriving at this website.

picture of a frightening scared old man. So the man is both frightening, and scared at the same time. Sounds like Shoney’s. Word to the wise, don’t take the last piece of meatloaf from the bar. Disappointment level of searcher: Wilford Brimley in the morning.

miracle ear. They are all miracles, really. Disapointment level: High pitched ringing noise.

“my two dads” & “murphy bed”. It’s the most innovative TV show of its generation, and the most innovative bed of its generation. If that is refering to a particular episode, you can bet there were some hijinx involved with Paul Reiser and the guy with the beard. Stay tuned for My Sister Sam. Disappointment level: Same as everything with the USA Network.

i want ham. Seconded. Disappointment level: Same as watching Food, Inc.

how many crackers are in a sleeve of ritz? 24. Disappointment level: Same as opening Lunchables.

joey lawrence “shoes off” Every young woman’s fantasy. What Joey Lawrence lacks in intellect, he more than makes up for in perfectly veined, high arched feet. Disappointment level: Whoa.

bichon frise ate an almond. My bichon ate my uncle’s glasses, get over it. Disappointment level: Cleaning up an almond terd.

times you have to fight the guy. I like to think this is a smaller 8 year old whose mom told him not to solve his difference with fighting, but his dad secretly taught him a few things, because he boxed some in the Navy and didn’t want his son to be a wuss. Then, when the kid had to fight the bully, probably named Chuck, he thought that would be the end of it, but it wasn’t. Or I could be wrong. Disappointment level:  No steak in the house for a black eye, so you have to use peas.

duble chestsitting. Sounds impossible. Disappointment level: Like the results of spellcheck.

stereophonic pumpkin raisin bran. Only makes sense if currently on drugs. Disappointment level: Having to show ID when buying Sudafed.

spilled vest. There is nothing worse than spilling your vest on something. Confused? See above. Disappointment level: Same as your friends seeing you in a vest.

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About jeffhoughton

I'm a sometimes writer, actor, comedian and an all the time adventurer.

One response »

  1. allan says:

    i think the classic cherry wood chests are the best for sitting on. they have the great wood smell and are usually fashioned into the awesome treasure chest arch that is perfect for leg dangling.

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