March 11, 2010

Sometimes I ask my wife if she has read my latest blog post, and she’ll say, “I skimmed it, they’re too long.” I’m fairly certain that she’s literate, so I think she’s not lying. With that in mind I will be doing a shorter blog post today. You have to sacrifice to make a marriage work.

For the last prompt I asked, “What are you annoyed about right now?”

I will use Tiffany’s answer:

“Nothing! I’m working from home, so that makes everything all better. The only thing is that I’m a tightwad, so my house is freezing cold. Stupid utility bill.”

Here is a listing of the things I would do if I worked from home.

8:00 Sleeping

8:30 Sleeping and drooling

9:42 Wake up hoping to stay asleep, but I have to go #1 really bad. I debate what my chances are of falling back to sleep while my bladder screams at me.

9:56 Unsuccessful

10:00 Don’t shower because I’m working from home.

10:13 Do the morning shuffle to get Cinnamon Toasters, the bag equivalent of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. In the morning I can’t pick my feet all the way up off the ground, so I’m forced to shuffle. Ever notice that cereal is better and more classy in a box, but the opposite is true for wine?

10:15 Shuffle back to the bathroom to get my robe. I’ve become addicted. I never used to be able to understand robe wearing. Now I get it. I really get it.

10:48 Sit down at the computer with honest intention of working.

10:59 Have now watched 14 Youtube videos

11:34 Give myself a pep talk about how “I can do this!” and how ” I’m a work from home beast.”

12:00 Tyra break. Today she has on women who admit to watching too much Jersey Shore. It is riveting.

12:18 Contemplate whether I think Tyra looks more like a cobra or…yep, a cobra.

1:23 Have a conversation with my dogs about how lucky they are that they don’t have to work

2:20 Yep, my conversation with my dogs lasted about an hour. Convince myself that getting on Facebook will somehow help me with work

2:24 Not understand why Facebook keeps asking me to reconfirm my e-mail address when I have done it several times over the last three months

2:31 Sit intrigued to learn that my friend Jesse is Topenga, if he was a character from Boy Meets World

3:42 Lunch break. I justify it somehow

3:51 Peel a clementine using just one peel

4:06 Freak out for a minute staring at my palm trying to figure out which is my lifeline, because the all look short.

4:11 Respond to a work e-mail. Booyah!

4:13 Wrap another successful day of work with a swig of milk out of the carton.

Next prompt: What is located directly behind you?

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About jeffhoughton

I'm a sometimes writer, actor, comedian and an all the time adventurer.

4 responses »

  1. allan says:

    a cuddling couple at the back of the bus getting their last physical embrace in before being ripped apart to do the bidding of the overlord mouse for four to eight hours…

  2. Amanda says:

    One part of my desk. I have the swanky 3-part kind of desk. The part behind me has cabinets and various artwork that I’ve acquired while working at the Arts Council – some of it was given to me, some of it was made by me, some of it is just sitting here for the time being, and some of it I found sitting on top of a cabinet where nobody could appreciate it.

  3. Michelle says:

    not too long! I read the whole thing. a bookshelf is directly behind me.

  4. sarahj83 says:

    my past *philosophical*

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