June 14, 2010
Here are the Things I’ve Noticed from the past show. Enjoy your socks off.
I’ve noticed that:
-To an illiterate person, a fortune cookie is just a cookie with an annoying piece of paper in it.
-I’m already afraid of dogs as is, but one that knows tae kwon do scares me to death.
-The current oil spill problem is like the bizarro version of the movie, Armageddon. We need someone from a meteor with experience in plugging things up to saves us.
-If water polo is played with men mounted on horses, then why isn’t water polo played with men mounted on sea horses?
-If I was transplanted here from 1985, I would assume everyone was really smart because whenever I saw people texting, I could only assume they were using calculators.
-Whenever I’m hanging out with a lot of people and there is a chance there will be a group picture, I will carry a machete with me, so when it’s time for the inevitable “crazy” picture, I’ll look the craziest.
-Maybe the reason unemployment is so high is because so many companies practice unfair hiring practices.