December 2, 2010

One day until The Mystery Hour. Check the couch cushions and the jacket you haven’t worn for months and scrounge up $5, it will be worth it. Just look at those beautiful guests—->>>

Here is a video from the last show, featuring Future Justin Bieber

For the last prompt I asked, “What is the third thing you do in your morning routine?”

I will use Ashley’s answer:

“Showering. Each part of my morning is a process for me, so by the time I convince myself that, “yes, I do have to get out of bed because Taylor Swift has taken over my iPod alarm shuffle,” and finally get around to locating a towel and clothing so as not to frighten family members walking from the bathroom to my basement, I’m up to step three… the shower. A blissful, steamy hot (until my ancient water heater runs out of water) shower.”

At first read it makes it sound like Taylor Swift shares a room with you, gets up before you and has to be in charge of your iPod shuffle. That Taylor Swift, she’s so controlling. Wouldn’t you think that by now she makes enough money to have her own room, or even her own house? ” Dang it, country music’s Taylor Swift, get your own iPod, and get out of my room country music’s Taylor Swift!”

Then we get to the shower, which I still have to convince myself to take. I am like a child that doesn’t want to bathe still. Every once in awhile I won’t shower and I’ll feel like I’m really getting away with something. It’s like taking a penny from the ‘take a penny, leave a penny’ dish, you’re not actually doing anything wrong, but it feels like it.

You know what the worst is? Taking a shower at someone else’s place. Here are the reasons:

1) It feels like you shouldn’t be naked there.

2) You have no idea how to turn the knobs to get the right amount of hot water. It comes out scalding, so you turn the knob back, but you’re accidentally turning it on hotter, only it takes awhile to realize that is the case.

3) It is like a One Eyed Willy booby trap attempting to find the mechanism that switches the water from the faucet to the shower.  

4) They only have volumizing shampoo, when the last thing you need is more volume.

5) Somehow you always leave the curtain out of the tub, leaving a small pond on the floor. Koi start arriving.

6) Your friend’s creepy brother, Jerry, doesn’t care about locks and privacy.

7) The towel may be freshly washed, or it may have only been washed months ago. Smelling is inconclusive because it just smells like their house.

8) The towel is their backup from years ago that is now a thin frayed thing resembling a cross between a paper towel, a washcloth, and fiberglass.

9) Bar soap. You made the switch months ago, your friend has not yet.

10) Taylor Swift constantly barging in to see what’s taking so long, pleading with you to take her to the zoo to see the ‘aminals.’

Next prompt: What would your high school guidance counselor say to you now?

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About jeffhoughton

I'm a sometimes writer, actor, comedian and an all the time adventurer.

One response »

  1. Dan says:

    My high school guidance counselor would probably say, “Who are you?”

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